Pleasure Meter

Martha McCormick on July 15, 2009

The Pleasure Meter is a good activity to start discussion early in a program, but not right at the beginning. It acquaints participants with each other, indicates preferences and lets us find out about the other members of our group. It can help you learn about the participants and may help your group define sexual behavior. As you discuss pleasure and then sex, encourage the group to include sex by yourself as sex, discuss roadblocks like health, culture, shame and religion.

Pleasure Meter

Pleasure Meter

With one Raccoon Circle, make an arc shape like the one shown here. This is your pleasure meter. Ask participants to stand along the edge of the meter, at the position that best relates to them. For example, the amount of pleasure that you have right now could be just like a gas tank gauge (empty, half a tank, full). Then have them move along the edge according to the amount of pleasure the following types of people “should have;” you don’t need to do all of them. And don’t define “pleasure.”

  • Infant
  • Toddler
  • Pre-school-age child
  • Kindergartner
  • Grade school student
  • Child with ADD
  • Someone in a wheelchair
  • Middle school student
  • High school student
  • College student
  • Someone in their 20’s
  • Pregnant woman
  • People in their 30’s and 40’s
  • Retired people
  • People in nursing homes
  • Octogenarians
  • Geezers

As the group arranges itself along the meter, ask them questions about:

  • What are you thinking about when I say pleasure?
  • What are some roadblocks to feeling pleasure?
  • Where do you get pleasure?
  • Why do red flags go up when we connect pleasure with certain groups?
  • How do you define pleasure?
  • Think of an activity you consider pleasurable–would you answer the phone when you are doing this activity?
  • What would you put on a “Pleasure Menu?”

Go Ask Alice

Martha McCormick on July 15, 2009

It’s so important to have reliable information when kids come to us with questions about sex. Or at least we need to be able to FIND that reliable information. This is a great resource for that kind of info–a Health Q & A Service of Columbia University.

It has an extensive archive, a search function and is very user friendly and interactive. There are sections on sexuality, sexual health and relationships as well as general health issues. The web site is about 14 years old but still highly relevant and edgy.

In the fall of 2007, I had the pleasure to attend a keynote address and workshop by Judith Steinhart, who was involved in starting this resource at Columbia University in New York City. She is AMAZING! I learned a lot from her; she became a sex educator quite by accident. One of her students asked her about getting condoms and she was off! I developed an activity for “Becoming an Approachable Adult” called the Pleasure Meter that is based on an activity she facilitated with about 350 people. Check it out.

Play

Martha McCormick on July 1, 2009

Play is a most important element of creativity. People know me for bringing toys to meetings to engage our playful side as we work. Building play into collaboration builds trust, encourages communication and open interaction. Taking time out to play when I’m struggling with a project will loosen the gears and help me focus again.  A walk, playing with Bitsy or weeding the garden can loosen my mind enough to find the way to move on.

As I listened to Speaking of Faith with Krista Tippett interviewing Stuart Brown, a physician and director of the National Institute for Play, I thought of times I’ve spent playing with friends. Jill and I creating Jill and Martha’s Relay. Eric with two yellow domes behind his ears to help hear me yelling across the field. Creating the cow milking lesson with Jody.

This Speaking of Faith webpage and podcast may open up some new ideas for you; it did for me. AND it justified my sometimes circuitous routes to accomplishing tasks. They’re talking about how important play is to the development of animals and children and how we need to keep play in our lives for the duration. I recently was in a meeting and Allen Cooper of the National Wildlife Federation used this slide show in his talk; it still sends shivers down my spine.

As I listened to Speaking of Faith with Krista Tippett interviewing Stuart Brown, a physician and director of the National Institute for Play, I thought of times I’ve spent playing with friends.  Jill and I creating Jill and Martha’s Relay.  Eric with two yellow domes behind his ears.  The creation of the cow milking lesson with Jody.
This webpage and podcast may open up some new ideas for you; it did for me.  AND it justified my sometimes circuitous routes to accomplishing tasks.  They’re talking about how important play is to the development of animals and children and how we need to keep play in our lives for the duration.
Play is a most important element of creativity.  People know me for bringing toys to meetings to engage our playful side as we work.  I like to build play into collaboration because it builds trust, communication and open interaction.  If I’m struggling with a project, taking time out to play will loosen the gears and help me focus again.
A walk, playing with the cats, or weeding the garden can loosen my mind enough to find the answers.  I was talking with my neighbor the other day about a practice she uses that encourages all of us to find answers within ourselves.  I hope this site helps you find some of those answers.